johnny-meme-on-storm:

lokis-meme-monsters:

johnny-meme-on-storm:

lokis-meme-monsters:

johnny-meme-on-storm:

lokis-meme-monsters:

johnny-meme-on-storm:

So apparently I’ve replaced a previous me from this universe and now I feel like life is a lie and nothing is real

I… yeah. I’m Jor. Jormungandr. I’m… I’m not sure if you’ve heard of me or not – I know there’s a bunch of my shit in Johnny’s room at the Baxter – hell, I don’t even know if you’re living at the Baxter. I was… Johnny – the other Johnny – and I were together until we weren’t taking a break complicated. 

You… If you want to know the guy you… replaced. He left a lot of stuff here. Clothes, which… You probably won’t want, but there’s… His X-box and games, a bunch of dvds, his weight set… The rocket ship lava lamp he made… His tool box, welding torch, the motorcycle he was rebuilding… Stuff like that.

I was gonna… I wasn’t sure if… you would want it, because you aren’t him, but… It’s here, if you do.

He left to “figure things out” and 

Sorry, that was really awkward. This is really awkward. 

Maybe you could come over for coffee 

Sorry. You probably don’t want  You need to figure out who you are in this world, not who he was. 

– Jormungandr

Sure, I wouldn’t mind coffee. Wouldn’t mind looking at that stuff. Hell a lot of it I actually had over in my…..universe? Dimension? Earth? It all confuses me. Portals isn’t my thing.

Clothes would be perfect, actually….and maybe a place to stay. I’ve been staying with Sue…..and………I think she’s starting to hate me.

Well… I’ve got an alchemy lab studio… office… thing with a futon, if you don’t mind the inevitable awkward moments that will occur when crashing with a non-binary shapeshifting sea serpent frost giant demi-god artist mage vigilante SHIELD consultant being that was in a relationship with a different version of you

fuck

I’m sorry about how awkward I am about this

– Jor

It’s totally fine. I can only imagine how awkward it must feel to have a different dimension version of….previous…..cared for person….don’t know how to word that…..here after everything.

And I’d appreciate a place to stay, yeah. I don’t mind whatever being you are. If you’re a decent person, I accept ya.

Up until now, I’ve always prided myself on how I handle awkward situations (generally by getting as far from said situation as possible and avoiding anyone and anything even peripherally involved with the awkward happenings for the minimum of a decade, but… Well, therapy happened.)

Like when a… prominent historical playwright… suggested I was one of his muses. 

Also, the time I woke up naked on an embalming table in the mid-19th century… after being autopsied.

Or the morning after I had a threesome with a US president and a famous Hollywood actress. 

Oh, and the realization that the wreckage of a ship I obliterated off the coast of England back in the late 1700′s… was the Bonhomme Richard.

Or my first mission with SHIELD when I got peckish and ate several HYDRA submersibles while waiting for further orders
 
Uhhhhmmm…You might have to sign some paperwork before moving in here…

– Jor

I’ll sign anything as long as I can hear more stories

Believe me, if you hang around them for any length of time, you’ll hear stories whether you sign the ndas or not, because they randomly disclose all kinds of shit that we can’t really confirm… Like getting fucked by/fucking famous people and witnessing/being involved in famous midgardian historical events.

– sleipnir lokisson