We took Fel to the American Girl Place to “meet a friend”.
It’s been 3 hours and she hasn’t stopped hugging and talking to her new doll, I am entirely convinced that this has been one of the top 25 parenting decisions @loki-god-of-memes and I have made so far.

Fel’s birthday is in 3 days, which means I have just under 48 hours to convince her that “creamy barbecue sauce and ham and pickle pinwheels with sprinkles” aren’t the best birthday treats for her kindergarten class.

(Or for human consumption in general.)

d-lewis-avengerwrangler:

So apparently Felan slipped on ice on the playground and accidentally bashed a third grader in the nuts with her cast on her way down.

Said third grader has been known to bully the kindergarteners.

Loki’s beaming.

Good girl!

he pushed my friend kia who is in furst grade and sed she was dum beecoz she was playing vengers and sed she wanted to be captan america like uncle steve so I punched him in the balls like a sneaky ninja

(…I can’t really condone her behavior, but I can’t really… condemn it, either..?)

So apparently Felan slipped on ice on the playground and accidentally bashed a third grader in the nuts with her cast on her way down.

Said third grader has been known to bully the kindergarteners.

Loki’s beaming.

She will learn nothing from this experience, I guarantee it.

@memecaptainmarvel would you mind picking up your tiny sidekick so we can get some food prep work done, please?
I have no idea why letting kids stay home on the day before Thanksgiving is considered a break…

Hey, Darcy, does Felan have dyscalculia? If she keeps having problems counting, you should get it checked out–I have it, and it’s easier to deal with early.

Yeah, it’s definitely gotten on our radar recently. The thing we always have to consider with Felan is if she’s having difficulty because of her “pupper brain”, because of the unique circumstances of her existence (which we still don’t fully understand, and probably never will), because of her personality (STUBBORN CHILD IS STUBBORN) or because it’s a human… jotun… hybrid… thing..?

For example, her impulsivity and concentration issues could stem from her natural canine instincts, her age, her magic, her personality, from either Loki and/or my genetics, or any combination of those factors.

So yeah, we’re keeping a close eye on her numerical issues, and we – Loki and I – have already had multiple re-iterations of “what if Felan can’t do ______ because of ____?” discussion, so we’ve kinda… prepared ourselves for it?

If it does turn out that she has dyscalculia, we’d be more than grateful for any tips you could give us for helping her out!

In hindsight, showing Felan Akinator *might* have been a mistake…

(But hey, now if you answer the right questions correctly, you might just get Felan as a result. If you do, submit a screenshot of it to us, please? Thanks.)

Whelp, here I go, off to drop off a new outfit for my 5-year-old, because Mud Puddles.

Conversations with a Kindergartner, 1/???

Felan: “Hey Mama, do you think Scrooge would want to come to my school sometime?”

Me: “I bet she’d pick you up after school someday, if y-”

Felan: “She could bring her spaceship and park it in front of school, like Corderoy’s dad did with the fire truck! But it’d be even better, cuz everyone knows space ships are better than fire trucks! AND THEN SHE COULD TALK TO EVERYONE ABOUT SPACE AND STARS AND ALL THE OTHER ALIENS SHE KNOWS!”

Me: “…I’m sensing yet another phone call coming from your teacher in the very near future.”